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Waving your hand in a ‘hello’ or a ‘goodbye’ to someone, seems like a simple, straightforward gesture, after all, it is one of the very first gestures we learn as a baby: “Wave bye-bye” or “Can you wave hello?”.
A wave is a safe and friendly greeting as it does not involve hugging or a handshake or a side-cheek kiss. A wave usually does not involve touching in any way, shape or form, and can, actually, be quite effective as an acceptance or recognition gesture.
There are many benefits to waving at someone.
A wave to an acquaintance you would rather not spend countless minutes engaging with in boring conversation, can often be enough to satisfy the requirement of proper acknowledgement etiquette —“Yes, of course I saw you. Didn’t you see me wave?”
Or, you might be hesitant to engage someone you like in conversation for fear that they do not feel the same way in return, in which case a simple wave, followed by a smile, can be a safe and welcoming gesture that is reciprocated.
I am quite sure that I am not the only one in this vast world who has waved to someone that I didn’t know and since waving our hand is somewhat instinctive, when we “think” we see someone we know, we immediately raise our arm and wave our hand, before our brain has had a chance to realize that we, indeed, DO NOT know the person. This inadvertent wave is so universal in its occurrence that often it actually leads to a reciprocal wave and a smile of “oops” acknowledgement. Sometimes, we end up striking up a conversation with the stranger and this leads to a friendship or, in some wildly romantic cases in the movies … a relationship.
Likewise, there can be adverse reactions to a wave, or, more precisely, lack thereof. The non-wave (neglecting to return a wave from a friend/acquaintance) can lead to the beginning of the end of a relationship; “I saw you and waved but you, apparently, didn’t see me because you didn’t wave back.” This is what they say but secretly, they think that you DID see them and PURPOSELY didn’t wave back because you were trying to avoid them because you MUST not like them and want the friendship to end.
And sometimes, a simple wave can lead to a most unexpected result… On one occasion, I happened to walk into a crowded bar where a charity auction was going on, only to spot a lovely couple that I knew, sitting across the room. Instinctively, I threw up my arm slightly and, after maintaining eye contact, waved my hand. The woman saw me and immediately smiled and, from her prominent perch on a bar stool, waved back. It just so happened, that at that precise moment, the eagle-eyed auctioneer happened to be saying “Do I hear $150?” and, noticing my friend’s raised arm, promptly acknowledged her ‘bid’! She immediately turned, in dismay, to the auctioneer, with her husband, now confused, whispering something in her ear. Unfortunately, no one else decided to offer a bid and it was a “going once…going twice…”
Sold! Sold!
Kathy Naumann, possessor of NATURALLY curly hair and the understanding that you can’t control everything!
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