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In terms of human development, there are many theorists who have paved the way in uncovering how and why we not only evolve, but also, why we may behave the way we do: Freud’s understanding of the Ego and Darwin’s application of survival instincts are well known throughout the world and have contributed greatly to therapeutic interventions which can successfully guide children and adults on a more positive path.
Evolution of our species for the past several million years brings changes to our features spanning thousands of years, yet, behavioral changes based on our ability to adapt and accommodate occur in only a matter of weeks.
It has been several months since the social distancing restrictions were put in place. At first, whenever I saw someone classified as a stranger to me, I held my breath and turned my head in the opposite direction for fear of inhaling or exhaling (through my mask) something microscopic that could make me, or those that I love, sick. When I saw (from a safe distance) someone that I knew and cared for, I wanted to hug them and had to hold back the urge for affection.
But, as time marched on, I adjusted. Now, when I see a stranger, I don’t even really notice them as I am focused on keeping a safe perimeter of 6 feet around me, and when I see my family, I wave and blow air kisses, similar to my actions of signing off from a Zoom meeting or gathering.
I, like millions of others, have adjusted my behavior to accommodate the need for remaining socially distant, and, as we begin the process of UNdistancing ourselves socially, I, like millions of others, am going to have to adjust all over again.
Hugging my Mom on Mother’s Day feels normal, but now, NOT hugging my Mom on Mother’s Day feels normal. Grocery shopping for fresh produce and fruits by picking up items, gently squeezing them and sniffing them for freshness, feels normal, but now, grabbing available fresh produce that is prepackaged without ever inspecting it, feels normal. Having a laugh-filled dinner out with my girlfriends feels normal, but now, having a silly Zoom meeting with my girlfriends while we all sip wine and eat our own home-cooked food, feels normal.
So, as we begin to get back to a life of a mix of what once felt normal and what now feels normal, I can only hope that I, as well as all of my fellow human beings, keep focus on what or who it was in the first place that drove us to seek the behavior, because, if I am still lucky enough to see my Mom on Mother’s Day, whether I can give her a hug or not, than that is what I would normally do. And since I still like eating fresh fruits and produce, then buying them is still what I would normally do. And giggling with my friends, whether via the internet or in a crowded restaurant, is still what I would normally do, because in the end, we haven’t actually lost our normal we just adjusted it.
Adapt! Adapt!
Kathy Naumann, possessor of NATURALLY curly hair and the understanding that you can’t control everything!
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