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I am in no way whatsoever a good singer; however, I can also make the same claim in classifying myself as a bad singer. Although I am often pitchy and out of tune, I do not stink as a singer for two reasons: First, I have had some limited musical education and second, I fully embrace the joy of singing.
Truth be told, I have always had a secret desire to stand in front of a BIG audience and belt out a tune. In my head, my listeners are moved to tearful expressions of their emotional response to my voice. In my head, I am also dressed in an amazingly cool outfit while I play a musical instrument which accompanies my song.
When I was younger, I pretended it was a guitar. Now that I am older and have never owned a guitar, I imagine myself playing the piano with the talent of the likes of Ms. Gaga. Needless to say, however, over the last few years, my singing episodes have declined. Perhaps it was the isolation and depression that was COVID? But recently, I have noticed that my singing is not only back, but louder and more joyful than ever.
Beginning in November and coinciding with my annual attempt at artistically improving myself by learning Christmas songs on the piano, I started to sing along to the songs I was playing. Perhaps it was because I was getting better at playing the songs and could focus on the lyrics? Maybe it was because I had more confidence in my voice? Or maybe it was because I had renewed fantasies about a future stage performance? Whatever the reason, it was only a few months ago that I realized I was back to singing along to my Alexa playlist. In the past, I used to turn the volume of the song way up when I sang along, and now…I leave the volume where it is and make my voice louder. In addition, I am finding that I don’t really care if my singing is good and have started to notice that I also don’t care if anyone is listening to me when I sing. Perhaps it is because, at my advancing age, it is obvious to all that I do not wish to become a professional singer. Despite what is going on in my head in terms of fantasies and singing aspirations, my joyful singing is not eliciting unwarranted critiques and so my confidence is growing…
As I’m thinking harder about the reason why I have become a joyful and publicly expressive singer, I think it may simply be because I feel more hope and happiness. Looking out my window at the blossoming magnolia tree whilst planning my next travel outing, this must be true because I am fully embracing Adele’s request to ‘Take it easy on me’. And so, it continues … I am singing…loudly and with joy for all to hear! HAPPY SPRING! HAPPY SPRING!
Kathy Naumann, possessor of NATURALLY curly hair and the understanding that you can’t control everything!
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